Just because

All women become like their mothers.  That is their tragedy. 
No man does.  That's his.  ~Oscar Wilde

April 24 is the 114th day of the year in the Gregorian calendar. There are 251 days remaining in the year.

On This Date...

In 1184, BC Greeks enter Troy using the Trojan Horse.
In 1533, William I of Orange is born.
In 1558, Mary Queen of Scots marries the Dauphin of France, François, at Notre Dame de Paris.
In 1800, The United States Library of Congress is established when President John Adams signs legislation to appropriate $5,000 to purchase "such books as may be necessary for the use of Congress".
In 1877, Federal troops were ordered out of New Orleans, ending the North's post-Civil War rule in the South.
In 1898, Spain declared war on the United States after rejecting America's ultimatum to withdraw from Cuba.
In 1905, Robert Penn Warren, an American writer and first poet laureate of the United States, was born.
In 1934, Shirley MacLaine, American actress and author is born.
In 1942, Barbra Streisand, American singer/actress is born
In 1949, Linda Lee Bartholomew Trotter, American nurse, police officer, doll maker, wood worker, chef, craft artist, seamstress, scouter, Harley momma, hippie and mother is born in Moroni, Utah
In 1953, Winston Churchill is knighted by Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom.
In 1957, Boris Williams, British musician (The Cure) is born.
In 1958, David J, British musician (Bauhaus) is born.
In 1961, Bob Dylan earned a $50 session fee for playing harmonica on Harry Belafonte's "Midnight Special." It was his recording debut.
In 1962, The Massachusetts Institute of Technology achieved the first satellite relay of a television signal, between Camp Parks, Calif., and Westford, Mass.
In 1967, Cosmonaut Vladimir Komarov dies in Soyuz 1, when the parachute fails to open. He was the first human to die during a space mission.
In 1974, Bud Abbott, American actor and comedian dies.
In 1980, Eight American servicemen died in an attempt to rescue hostages from the U.S. embassy in Tehran.
In 1982, Kelly Clarkson, American singer is born.
In 1984, Apple Computer, Inc. released its Apple IIc portable computer.
In 1990, STS-31: The Hubble Space Telescope is launched by the Space Shuttle Discovery.
In 2005, Pope Benedict XVI was formally installed as leader of the Roman Catholic Church in cermonies at the Vatican.
In 2007, Former Russian President Boris Yeltsin died of heart failure yesterday at the age of 76.

http://www.co.utah.ut.us/Dept/COMMISH/Data/Minutes/CM/1999/011999.HTM
http://www.goldenlife-labs.com/HELPFldr/provocub.html
http://www.heraldextra.com/content/view/61688/4/
http://news.google.com/archivesearch?ie

Some reflections on aging:
* Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
* The older you get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
* You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
* I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
* Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don't recognize you.
* The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.
* My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
* It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.
* It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
* These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter.. I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.
* Keep a diary... it will be a great source of comfort and a handy reminder of what you did yesterday.

Things My Mother Taught Me

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE...
"If you're going kill each other, do it outside - I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me RELIGION...
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me LOGIC...
"Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me LOGIC... #2
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT...
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS...
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM...
"Will you LOOK at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA...
"You'll sit there 'till all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER...
"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY...
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times: Don't exaggerate!"

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION...
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY...
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION...
"Just wait until we get home."

My mother taught me about RECEIVING...
"You are going to get it when we get home!"

My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE...
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

My mother taught me to THINK AHEAD...
"If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

My mother taught me ESP...
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

My mother taught me HUMOR...
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT...
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

My mother taught me about SEX...
"How do you think you got here?"

My mother taught me about GENETICS...
"You're just like your father."

My mother taught me about my ROOTS...
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"

My mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE...
"When you get to be my age, you will understand."
"One day you'll have kids ...and I hope they turn out just like you!"